Practicalmadness

This is the first of many updates for today, so I don't wanna hear any whining about its brevity or how Sammy Sosa is telling you to burn things through the TV. I don't wanna hear it.

1. Hotmail: I have discovered how to make my MSN Hotmail account usable despite all the spam: to block all messages except those from people in my address book who would be using my Practical, SDF or top-secret Ameritech addresses anyway. This will save me the thirty minutes I just had to spend de-spamming my Inbox, but will also severely curtail my access to penis enlargement, great business opportunities and Wacky William's Daily Wack.

2. Soda: Has anyone seen the new Dr. Pepper Red Fusion drink yet? It's a cherry-infused version of Dr. Pepper which is quite similar to a far more obscure (and far more storied) Southern soda; this can only be a good thing. (After thought: I had no idea Cheerwine was even still being made, let alone had a slick, Flash-ridden website. And Cheerwine Ice Cream? My God.)

3. Hell: This past weekend the heat index in Chicago topped 110°. Often. And we discovered that sweaty, tousle-haired employees of a certain coffee leviathan are not 100% crisp, clean and shinybright when faced with air thicker and more warm than the pea soup at the corner cafe. So now even the air is out to get me, and just when you thought that was bad enough, that's when the toilet exploded.