Practicalmadness

1. After wringing a few dozen shots out of an old, timerless La Marzocco espresso machine -- a process which can involve much hitting, grunting and swinging of heavy metal things -- I feel very much better.

2. I didn't say too much about last night's relaunch of Practicalmadness Reader Services, so here's the skinny: Reader Services are interactive features which require registration. There are not currently any Reader Services on the site, although the first one -- the Survivor Game -- will launch later this week, and the long-awaited (by me) message board -- Cafe Practical -- will show up some time this month.

The scripts which handle logging in, logging out and registration are decent but not perfect, although everything should work fine 95% of the time for 95% of users, and will only get better. You can now log in (or out) from any recently-built Practical page, which should include nearly everything currently accessible from the homepage. Other pages will be phased in as necessary.

What this means for you: there are flaws in my hastily whipped-together programs which can make signing up for and using Reader Services annoying, perhaps inconvenient, but not at all impossible, certainly not unenjoyable. And it will only get better.

3. Imagine, if you will, a battle between cartoon characters, one shaped like a bottle of Pepsi Blue, the other shaped like a bottle of Dr. Pepper Red Fusion. Hold that image. It's funny.

Now imagine, if you will, an ice blended creme beverage which shall remain nameless, but rhymes with 'Nappuccino,' and instead of being white, off-white, chocolate-colored or khaki, it is blue like big whales. This is not a Mountain Dew Blue Shock Slurpee, no, this is a smoother, more subtle drink with a hint of vanilla and the refreshing down-home goodness of blueberry pancake syrup.

Imagine this drink in the car cupholder of your worst enemy.

Smile, as this is the thought that will get you through the latter eight hours of a twelve-hour workday that was only eight hours when you went to bed last night but grew while you were sleeping, and now is as like an 800-lb. gorilla, unchained, fists in pounding mode. Looking in your general direction. Angrily.

But look on the bright side: the gorilla is blue.